I’ve been discussing this topic with a few female friends of mine recently and stumbled upon this post today by Pirate over at adventures under my pirate flag. It’s been upsetting lately, as I’m still in the dating game at age thirty, and finding that not only are men not “men” anymore, but women have forgotten how to be ladies. Pirate seems to have the 4-1-1 on this topic so I wanted her to explain it in her own words.
Here is a funny Ecard travelling around out there that caught my attention and seemed relevant in many walks of life.
Although I find this incredibly humorous, it is sadly true for many people I see today. Now, I like looking just as attractive as the next gal, and I think that if you have a great body, hell let’s show that bad boy off- but there is a time and place for everything.
Shorts should be longer than your underwear (and your cookie, as described above!) Bathing suits should be worn in the pool- and only in such settings. There is a difference between showing some cleavage and showing some nipple- let’s not get borderline with it. I recently learned the term ‘turtle dress.’ A guy told me this is when a girls dress is so short you can see her turtle- we shouldn’t even have a need for this!
This brings me to my next point. Women of my generation and those below me are constantly complaining how they cannot find a decent man. We can find all the sex we want- but relationships, that’s another story. I’m not saying women are to blame, but I’m saying we can change the culture.
Of course a guy is going to want to have sex with you if you are showing them everything for free. Yes they are going to want to bang you if you give it away on the first date. Guys are still guys biologically- we must make them work to uncover the gentlemen.
On the same note- my goodness ladies, can we please watch what comes out of our mouths! I’m all for being vulgar and joking around with my girlfriends- but let’s keep the locker room talk behind closed doors. We find it morally reprehensible when guys talk about certain subjects in front of us- here’s a hint, they are no different! We have heard it time and time again, lady in the street- freak in the bed; act like a lady- think like a man; they want a girl they can bring home to mom. LISTEN TO THESE SAYINGS!
A man should cherish you for the beautiful creature that you are and treat you as his life companion. You should be the softer side of him and you should both compliment each other. Make guys woo you! Courting is not dead and the right guy will work to win your affections.
I am dating a guy that asked me out for 3 months before I said yes. THREE MONTHS! That is longer than most of my relationships last (ahem.. like those I give it away too soon to!) This guy courted me, treats me like gold, and is the gentlemen in the relationship. I’m not saying he is Prince Charming and we are getting married and riding off into the sunset- what I’m saying is there is a relationship to be cherished.
We set ourselves up for the relationship that we desire. Women, we control the pace and guidelines. I wanted this guy to see me as the keeper that I am. I wanted him to cherish me and conceive a lasting relationship because what I was doing wasn’t working. So you know what, I went out with him. I desired to go to an event, and he made it happen. I didn’t go out and get hammered and sleep with him on the first date. I didn’t drink too much and sleep with him on the 2nd date! I required him to work for my affections, and because he saw me as a valuable entity, he put in the work.
If we all did this a little more often, we might end the continuing cycle of heartache and fruitless sexual encounters that cause us exhaustion and depression. There comes a time when you want more than just a pretty face, you want a life companion. Turtle dresses don’t bring you companionship.
I’ll leave you with a beautiful quote I found.
The woman came from a man’s rib. Not from his feet to be walked over. Not from his head to be superior, but from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved.